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having been in sydney for more than two months already, i realised how little i have blogged about the daily going ons in my life.not that it has been all boring and not worth mentioning(in fact quite the opposite).well partly because of my love to procrasinate(>.<), but more importantly i feel it's so easy to get carried away with the tons of things going on day in day out that i start to lose the point of the big picture, of what being in sydney really means for me.im still figuring that out really, but occasionally and randomly i do get glimpses of it that gives me food for thought for the week.

jus like today.

as i was taking one of those leisurely walks home from ocf, though essentially was just like any walk down an ordinary lane, i realised how much im starting to love each moment i spend jus walking admist the buzz of activities around, just absorbed in looking and thinking about everything and anything. it's like how im learning to see things with new eyes, learning the value of solitude when things around threaten to overwhelm me.i see things going on, but i see them from outside its little bubble. not far away.jus outside. i see how i need people to uphold and keep me(and vice versa), but at the same time i can see it all with a sort of detachness that i somehow cant explain.

maybe im getting used to being alone. maybe that's why im so hesitant to think about love now.perhaps that's why getting into a relationship with anyone just doesnt hold that much a significance to me as it used to(or should i say obsession>.<). i dont deny there are days i wish my childish dreams come true but still, it's okay now.whether or not they become a reality, it doesnt hurt so much to think about it anymore. i feel less bitter and i feel like i can start to love again like i've never been hurt.

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a song, any song.

cruel to be kind - letters to cleo one of those songs that still dont make sense to me even though i read the lyrics a million times over. but i love it nonetheless, perhaps because of the smile that creeps onto my face everytime i think of the sweet scene between patrick verona and kat stratford in 10 things i hate about you . there's just something about romantic shows that always seem to get me, no matter how cheesy these moments might seem on hindsight.