life's mean reds.

i was telling my bro that i really liked a particular song so i kinda forced him to listen to it. :( but after barely listening to it for a minute, he said that it was boring and immediately clicked for the next song. what constitutes a good song? for me, a melody that wells up emotive feelings in you. one with well-penned lyrics that inspire you.one that you find yourself humming to unconsciously. to my brother though(i think), it's one with sophisticated band sounds, the more guitar solos or cool add-ons, the better. one that makes you exhilerated just listening to it. one with powerful vocals. and the list goes on. it just amazes me every now and then when im faced with the realisation of how different people can be and how their preconceived assumptions and inclinations can affect the way they define and see things in life.

unable to hold in the suspense any longer, my bro gave me my farewell gift yesterday night. haha or maybe he decided to present it to me because my mum and i were bugging him the whole night to buy me an ipod. hm.but oh wells. here it is. haha when i first saw it i thought was a frog. apparently, it's a sort of saving box where you can put the coin on the lever then wait for the lever to flip the coin into the frog looking thing. haha my bro tried to do a live demonstration and we waited in anticipation but somehow the coin managed to flip anywhere and everywhere but the mouth >.< so to end our torture watching him and his embarrassment, my bro had to shove the coin down the frog's throat. after which he gave me a sheepish smile. there you go. haha but my bro insists that it's meant for other uses other than a modern variation of a piggy bank.he says that when im bothered by any problems when im in australia, i can write it down then flip it into the frog thingy's

felt like if i hugged cher any longer i would really start tearing. the realisation that im leaving for a totally new environment is finally settling in i guess. and im scared:/

happy valentine's :) as overrated a day as it is, i still love it for its notions of everlasting love and happiness. call me the sort of hopeless romantic that devious salesmen targets...but too bad for them, i dont have a date to splurge on and pamper:P nope, no date 20th year running but im not bothered, honestly. why should i be? i've hurt myself too many times, incessantly i would say, over people in whose world i am probably nothing but a tiny speck of dust; while on the other hand, ive many many people around me with so much love just waiting for me to receive it:) so may this valentines day be a reminder to me to get out of my little shell and seek not so much to be loved, as to love; to be consoled, as to console; to be understood, as to understand :) hee.random pictures of people who really made me smile with my heart for the past two weeks (: (since a fren of mine says a blog with words alone is boring >.< haha yes.)

i like the word "happyness". it removes i from the picture and replaces it with y for yahweh. and with that comes the promise that every good and perfect thing comes from God. that's what happyness really is.

all these while i was determined not to think more than i should. adamant in my refusal to worry about the uncertainities or loneliness that the near future will hold for me. but it's getting hard. not because the time is coming so soon. but rather ive been feeling so blessed and loved by my friends and family that it's getting more heartbreaking now to say goodbye. the longer the periods of enjoyment, the more i feel the ache of an impending farewell. the happier days get, the more i am reminded of their absence when it's time to go. it's not goodbye forever i know, but somehow tonight, im already starting to miss the people i love.

dear Lord, thank you for today, in spite of failing my driving test. Lord, im still grateful for every single thing today. perhaps if i hadnt failed it, i wouldnt realise what a prideful person i still am inside. i wouldnt have been humbled like i was. i wouldnt think twice about the consequences of reckless driving. and wouldnt have realised that there's still much in me that needs changing. i wouldnt remember the feeling of disappointment or the weary feelings after i have cried; after all, failures and all seem like a distant blurred memory now that i have merely been enjoying my extended break that i have grown so comfortable with. it wouldnt have dawned upon me that im fallible and very, very vulnerable. i wouldnt realise that my tears can hurt the people around me. and most importantly, i wouldnt have realise what a loving family i am blessed with, and how much i really do love them. thank you for reassuring words from daddy, mummy and yes, i know gabriel tried as well:) than

i would have used my blog as a venting ground today only that i havent figured out how to password protect a post:/

i was never comfortable with expressing my own views about fashion, or daring to dress just the way i love and am, that is, till i read this yesterday. from stylist and photographer Manuela Pavesi (also known as Miuccia Prada’s best friend): “Today everyone wants to be beautiful, which looks very strange to me. Because fashion is not about being beautiful, it’s about wearing something you love and making you think about a lot of things. The trend today is just to be slim with no wrinkles. But style and fashion have nothing to do with being young and pretty - they are beyond that.” how true(:

觉得自己好没用 明明很久以前已放下了那份爱慕 心中不时还是有些眷恋 有些伤感 有些不依然 有些空虚 有些无奈 有些烦躁 就如今天 突然有种很想被心爱的人呵护，拥抱的感觉。

so they say the world's first eco-city, Dongtan is all but bad news, being sustainable not only environmentally, but also socially, economically and culturally. im not sure if i will embrace this idea as warmly as i should. after all, being an advocate for out poor environment for the longest time, i should be overjoyed that at last, some sort of concrete action is taking place. still, there's this nagging feeling in me that this eco-city may be just a veiled attempt to get rid of marshes in the region to create more economically viable areas--it's urbanisation all over again, only that it's marketed with the eco label. think about it. it perturbed me when i read today's papers and a minister was quoted saying that Dongtan will be created over wastelands, thus no harm will be caused to the natural environment.first of all, can agricultural land near a large ecologically significant wetland be considered a wasteland? even if we presume that this agricultural land is

reasons why getting attached doesnt seem that much of a draw to me anymore: 1. it has dawned upon me that it's probably impossible to find a single and available guy in singapore who looks like daniel wu, or takuya kimura. 2. it has dawned upon me that it's probably impossible to find a single and available guy in singapore who looks like daniel wu, or takuya kimura AND will appreciate me just the way i am and thus sparing me the sad fate of the constantly being in a one sided affair. 3. most of my friends in a relationship tell me it's better to be single. 4. i choose to believe them. 5. im afraid of getting hurt. 6. im afraid of hurting someone. 7. im just being sour grapes.